Hyphy-Delity

Haji Springer

News has reached the Fat Lace offices that Bay Area rappers have finally achieved the numbers they have been dreaming of since their recent creative resurgence. Through a combination of hard work, Hyphy movement bandwagon jumpers and the ever-expanding rosters of the Bay’s major players, it has been reported that for the first time in hip-hop history they have done numbers Soundscan never thought possible. For the first weeks in September, the Bay Area released more CDs than were actually sold. Whilst the true figures are still to be confirmed, the news has sparked wild celebrations in the Frisco, Oakland and Vallejo areas. One Crestside club is apparently holding a 7-day long party, playing only the music of Mac Dre’s Thizz Nation, concluding with the launch party for their totally commercially ignored ‘Thizz Nation Vol. 346’ Meanwhile Messy Marv, is holding open prison visits for signings of his multiple independent 2007 releases that include ‘What You Know about Me Vol. 1-2’, ‘Filmoe Nation Vol. 1-2’, partnerships with Keak, Mitchy Slick and Prince Bugsy and of course, the classic, ‘You Wanna Make A Record? Let’s Just Make A Fucking Record! Vol. 1-45’.

The ridiculously prolific Mob Figaz were contacted regarding this incredible news, with only The Jacka available for comment, as the others were on their third tight studio deadline that week. “Yeah, we work on a one-day, one-album deadline. Otherwise there’s simply no way we’re gonna keep ahead of the buying public even in these days of downloading and general comsumer apathy. That way, we can guarantee that by flooding the market we maintain the greatest level of apathy towards our product.” Turf Talk confirmed such thinking. Despite releasing what is clearly the most incredible album of the year in ‘West Coast Vaccine’, he still manages to make the general public give two flying fucks about him. “Yeah, I realised that my LP was a near masterpiece, but I had to just keep getting on other people’s records, mixtapes and whatever, just to keep my nose ahead, along with Thizz, Demolition Men, Metal Mouth, Andre Nickatina, Mob Figaz and the rest. Sick Wid It, my crew, is now gearing up for our own series of releases which is really gonna push us ahead of the pack. Our first release will be ‘Turf Talk Brings The Hood Colabilition – Monday 8th October’, then make sure you stay on the look out for the follow ups ‘Turf Talk Brings The Hood Colabilition – Tuesday 9th October’ and ‘Turf Talk Brings The Hood Colabilition – Wednesday 10th October’.

the jacka

 

Mac Dre, who was cruelly slain on November 2004, managed to release what seemed like an album damn near every minute whilst alive and remains the inspiration for this relentless recording in the Bay. He in turn found his inspiration from British indie group The Fall who knocked albums out in their lunchtime back in the 80s. In his final interview with Murder Dog magazine, he was quoted as saying, “Man I miss Mark E Smith and his ever-changing line up, The Fall were my shit, ya feel me cuddie? However, for the record I never liked The Wonder Stuff – don’t get it twisted – that ‘Size Of A Cow’ shit was horrible, yadidibooboo?”.

Analysts are predicting that in the short term these release figures are simply going to escalate, whilst sales remain static, despite the fact that Bay Area hip-hop remains some of the freshest material on offer in a stale U.S. hip-hop scene. The Bay, however, used to being pillaged for slang, music style and general innovation has chosen to embrace rather than fight the feeling, or in the words of Rydah J. Klyde “I’ll make 7 CDs put em in a line/Add 7 more before you’ve heard this rhyme/And then I’ll make 7 more, before I call time, now that’s 21 CDs sitting in the racks at Best Buy.”

 

Here’s some of the dope Bay Area music that quite mystifyingly people haven’t been buying over the past years:

 

Turf Talk – I’m Ghetto

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San Quinn – Do That For Me

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P.S.D., Keak Da Sneak, Messy Marv, E-40 – Gumbo Pot

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13 Responses to "Hyphy-Delity"
  1. Reply whut? September 27, 2007 15:48 pm

    funny stuff! One of my faves was the Mistah FAB EP, one of the few bits I’ve found on wax since jumping on the hyphie bandwagon like you guys did!

  2. Reply whut? September 27, 2007 15:51 pm

    actually if I bought ‘Go Dumb’ by Federation on promo 12″ a few years back before I even heard the word hyphie just because I thought it sounded better than the rest of the deluge of latest Hip Hop snorefests on offer then maybe I didn’t jump on a bandwagon. Gotta check that Turf Talk LP. Someone press some of this shit up on wax, please.

  3. Reply Give Thizz To Yo Kidz September 27, 2007 16:47 pm

    “The ridiculously prolific Mob Figaz”

    Word to the cuddie!

    Now go buy Mob Trial 2, all jokes aside, it’s better than the generally shitty Thizz Nation comps.

  4. Reply robdarlo September 27, 2007 16:51 pm

    Yeah ‘Mob Trial 2’ is straight!

  5. Reply lace da booze September 27, 2007 17:15 pm

    Miles Hunt is the truth and ‘Size Of A Cow’ is the epitome of that whole early 90s student union – indie disco steelo dunny

  6. Reply yaboy po September 27, 2007 17:48 pm

    MAN MOTHER FUCKING GREAT POST THE BAY GOES HARD PERIOD MAN THE NIGGA MESS MOS DEF FUCKS WITH ALL THESE MAINSTREAN NIGGAS ON A DOPE BOY LYRICAL LEVEL WEST COAST VACINE SLAPS HARD AND RIP MOTHER FUCKING MAC DRE THEY HATE ON THE NIGGA TO HARD MAN I DIDNT EVEN KNOW WHO HE WAS UNTIL I MOVED TO THE MIDWEST N FOUND OUT WHAT I WAS MISSIN HE WASNT EVEN MENTION CEPT FOR A PIC IN THE XXL 10TH ANNIVERSAY ISSUE BUT YEA YOU MADE A LIFE LONG FAN OF YA BLOG WITH THIS ONE INSTEAD OF ME JUS SWINGING BY ONCE IN A WHILE GREAT POST MAN (AND SORRY FOR THE CAPS MY BUTTONS JAMMED)

  7. Reply Koaste September 27, 2007 18:22 pm

    You need to check Yayo by Chubbie Baby ft Hell Rell… pure dopeness.

  8. Reply FrankZito September 28, 2007 08:48 am

    What about Nickatina? you cant front on any of his albums. And he raps about wearing his ‘house-shoes’. Thats some ill slipper-related shit right there playuhz

  9. Reply Give Thizz To Yo Kidz September 28, 2007 09:18 am

    It’s all about the Horns and Halos series. Also check ‘W-X I’ll Tell U-Y’ on Booty Star (Glock Tawk) for some 2007 Nickatina!

  10. Reply FrankZito September 28, 2007 09:48 am

    oh word? new Andre? Thanks, ill check that ‘i dont know why they grinnin, cos these suckers aint winnin’

  11. Reply Give Thizz To Yo Kidz September 28, 2007 11:05 am

    http://www.amazon.com/Booty-Star-Glock-Tawk-DVD/dp/B000UNXZBS

  12. Reply FrankZito September 30, 2007 10:58 am

    ‘Jungle’ from one of the horns and halos cd’s is hella tight

  13. Reply Give Thizz To Yo Kidz September 30, 2007 14:19 pm

    I think it was from one of his older CDs, but along with ‘Fly Like A Bird’ ft Dubee, it’s one of his best – for those that don’t know: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oFyvYQkHPd8

    [audio only]

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